Friday, August 23, 2013

One Good Turn

by Connie Ferdon from the August 29, 2013 issue

Tagline: Later, Sandra and Adam would tell their friends that their meeting was an accident...and it really was!

In a Nutshell: Sandra is in a hurry to get a birthday card in the mail for her sister, unfortunately, she gets into a fender bender while backing out of her parking spot. The man whose car she hit, Adam, offers to pay for the damage because it's his fault. When she gets back into her car, she finds out the battery is dead. He helps her with jumper cables, and afterward, even though the post office has closed, she's not upset at all because she has a date.

Observations: I thought this story did a good job of showing Sandra's interest in the hero.

The man glanced up with guilty eyes--but what eyes! Beautiful intense and blue.

Momentarily startled by his gaze, Sandra couldn't find her voice.

Regaining her faculties, she smiled--and her irritation dissipated.

Sandra nodded, torn between needing to get to the post office and not wanting to end her conversation with this gorgeous guy.

"No problem," she said with a smile, enjoying the warmth of his handshake. Reluctantly she withdrew her and and said, "I have to run. I'll call you later, okay?"

Thoughts of the very cute Adam Browning flashed through her head as she buckled up.

Those are all the instances where we see Sandra's interest in Adam, more than I remembered reading. It's clear the man affected her!

However, I wondered why he was still hanging around and whether he was driving away and saw her pop her hood... If that's what happened, why did he park "in the lot over there"? Why didn't he just drive back over to the lot she was in. It seemed strange.

Photo by Charles Williams (cc)

6 comments:

Pat said...

I have to go back and look at this story again, Kate. For some reason I thought they were on the street, not in a parking lot. No clue why that popped into my head when I read your review.

I like this story because it was something in everyday life that could actually happen.

Chris said...

I also like stories that are based on everyday happenings and car bumps are very commonplace. Surely they ARE on the street, though, aren't they? It's only at the end that he says he's 'parked in the lot over there' (or does lot mean bay? Maybe it's just my UK/USA confusion again). When Adam says 'we meet again' it gave me the impression of being some time later. He's had time to drive off, get a place in the car-park, and walk back again. Sandra, meanwhile, the one who is meant to be in a hurry, has done nothing but try and start her car and pop the hood, a lapse in my mind of just a few seconds. They seemed to be operating on two different time scales, although maybe it was clearer in the original. Other than that, I thought the story worked well.

Anonymous said...

I agree that the author did a good job showing how the hero affected the heroine, but I kept finding myself glazing over most of the story.

This story was not a favorite. Just my two cents. However, I did like her character names.

Mary Ann said...

I agree. Nicely written, but car trouble, AGAIN. ugh.

Mary Jo said...

It is not only the limited length of these little stories that causes some readers to "glaze over", but the short list of acceptable content. I suppose that is to represent the
mundane lives of the target audience. Actually, each one of these stories should be a little jewel, unique and glowing, not a repetition of the predictable. The publisher is missing the chance to offer better fiction.

Actually, given the editorial choices at WW, I think the author did a good job with this story. Well, I have been hit in a parking lot and there was no cute guy there to cheer me up. Just a crying young woman whose husband told me later that it was my fault she backed into me.

Anonymous said...

Regarding Mary Jo's comment:

"Actually, each one of these stories should be a little jewel, unique and glowing, not a repetition of the predictable. The publisher is missing the chance to offer better fiction."

Nicely put Mary Jo! I definitely have to agree!